Here are some of my thoughts from way back in mid March of this spring. For whatever reason I didn't make them public at the time. Soon I'll post some reflections from the summer, but for now....
Personal Musing: The Love of God
These last few weeks I've been thinking a lot about God's love for me, and God's love for everyone.
The Love of God is greater far
than tongue or pen can ever tell
It goes beyond the highest star
and reaches to the lowest hell
These words come from one of my favorite hymns and are a great reminder of God's unfathomable love for us.
Could we with ink the ocean fill
and were the skies of parchment made
were every stalk on earth
and everyone a scribe by trade
to write the love of God above
would drain the ocean dry
nor could the scroll contain the whole
though stretched from sky to sky.
I know that if I were to try and write about all the ways I've seen and felt God's love, both in my life and in the lives of those around me, I would surely have a book that never ends.
Most recently I've been amazed at how God's love works on such a personal level. A couple of weeks ago I attended a Christian Camping Conference in Indiana. It'd been a busy couple of weeks and there were things I needed to do in the office, but I had already committed to going so I went with an anxious heart.
In the midst of the week the speaker gave a talk about the deep longings of our heart. As the message began I heard God speak. It was the second time that I've felt God communicate to me so directly. What left me in tears for the rest of the night was not what God had said so much as that the supreme God and creator of the universe had not forgotten me. Even though my faith life was in a bit of a ditch, and I was doing fine with God at the edge of my life, God had not forgotten me.
We all hear God and know God's love in different ways, but it takes time to know and understand that love. Its like making a new friend. It takes time to understand how to be with each other, how to recognize their voice, or learn their hand writing. I am still learning, and hopefully will continue learning for the rest of my life.
Directly right after that conference I was signed up to attend the Men's Way of Christ weekend (www.WayofChrist.net), but the timing for me was very uncomfortable. I was just returning from the conference in Indiana were I was tired from late nights of fellowshipping. I was spiritually full from powerful speakers and worship, emotionally raw from a fresh encounter with God, and overall ready to spend a weekend with limited people time. Not to mention the stress of the work on my desk waiting for me when I got back. Instead I went to the Way of Christ weekend with barely 24hrs of recovery time, with a large chunk of that spent getting caught up on half a week's work.
But the timing was all part of God's plan. Through that weekend my exhaustion was met with new friendships and the face of Christ in the other men there that weekend. I found fresh hope in the Godly men I got to know over the weekend. My anxiety was consoled by the reminder that God is at work, and the way God works is not always what will be most comfortable to us. But God's work is part of God's love. The timing of both events, while initially annoying for me, was actually part of a bigger plan, through which I was reminded of how much God loves me.
In what ways is God trying to show you his love? Maybe it's through the blessings you've received, family, friends, community. Maybe it's in answered prayers, or peace in times of chaos. Maybe God is showing you love by withholding something from you, something that you think you want, but God knows you are not ready for. Or maybe you feel lost and separated from God's love, like Mother Teresa or St John of the Cross.
I cannot profess to know everything about God's love, but I do know that it's more powerful than we can imagine, closer than we can comprehend, and open to all who reach for it.
Keep Listening and Searching.
